A Scissors vs. A Pair of Scissors

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Yes, hello, this is Neil White from upstate New York.

Hi, Neil, welcome to the show.

Oh, thank you.

I have a question about the use of hair, like with a pair of scissors, pair of pliers. My wife says it’s already plural, so she calls, you know, when she asks for a pair of scissors, she says, and we’ve got scissors or a scissors. And it’s always been a little bone in contention with us, you know. Why is it a pair of pants? If you have one leg, are you just wearing a pant?

Wait.

So, Neil, she says, pass me a scissors?

Well, she’ll say, pass me these scissors.

These scissors.

Okay. So let’s just talk about scissors because I think this is the core of your question. It’s going to help with the other ones. For me, it’s not a scissors. It’s more than one. It’s a pair of scissors because each one of the blades, even though they’re connected in the middle to, you know, forming a single device, there are still two blades. And each one of them is a scissor. And they travel together because without the pair of them, you don’t have scissors and there’s no cutting involved.

And you can never make a snowflake.

Exactly. That’s always been my argument with my wife. She says, well, they’re already plural, so it’s not a pair. It’s one thing makes a pair of scissors. But that’s always been my argument.

So does she put on a pants in the morning?

A pants?

Yeah, exactly. You know, it’s fine with a pair of pants, and she does put on a bra. Why isn’t that a pair?

There’s another question.

I’m sorry?

Are you riding a motorcycle?

Oh, no, I’m outside on my cell phone.

Okay. All right. But just to clarify here, the truth is that you’re both right. Historically speaking, scissors can be either singular or plural. I know it’s weird, but that’s the English language for you. English is kind of a beautiful creature with warts everywhere. It’s just not quite perfect. And so you can say things like, these scissors are very sharp, or this scissors is very sharp.

That just feels weird.

You can say it.

I know, it’s weird to me.

No, if you’re going to say that, I’m going to take it apart and give you one of the blades and say, this scissor is very sharp.

No, this scissors, plural.

No.

So saying these is…

That’s always been the…

We don’t argue about it.

That’s always been that we’re both right.

Well, there we go. That’s the nice thing about this. If you really want something pointless to argue about, this is the topic. Don’t argue about money or the kids or what movie to see. This is the topic because you’ll never resolve it.

Well, thank you so much for your call.

Okay.

I appreciate it.

All right, Neil.

Take care, Neil.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

There’s a questioning threatening to divide you and your spouse. Maybe we can help. Give us a call. The number is 1-877-929-9673 or send an email. The address is words@waywordradio.org.