Don’t Be A Come-Upper

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hey, hello.

I’m Stacey Amaral. I live in Chelsea, Massachusetts. I had this experience as a child with a word that, or words that my grandfather used that nobody in the world in our family or any place else knew where they came from. So I thought, oh, you all may know.

Why?

Yeah. So my grandparents had a little store in New York in the city, and they worked six days a week. They worked really hard. And so on Sundays, that was the only day off, and my grandfather would clean the apartment and then take us out so my grandma could rest. And before he took us out, he would say the following. He’d say, now, don’t come up up the place. Don’t be a come-op or I just clean. And we’d say, what do you mean, come-op? What’s a come-op?

So I’m calling to ask about that word as a noun and as a verb. As a noun and as a verb. And so tell us a little bit about your grandfather.

So he was born in a small town in Russia, in either Russia or Ukraine. He kept moving around, or Belarus in Ukraine. And he came to the country as a little boy. He grew up in the Lower East Side. So his English, he spoke English okay, had a little bit of an accent, but that’s who he was. He was a great guy, but that was a word we had never heard before. Nobody else knows.

Yeah, I can see why it’s a little bit of a puzzle. I, you know, you’ve called us about this a few times and I’ve listened to the voicemails. And so I’ve done some digging on this, Stacey. And I think I have an answer for you, but I wouldn’t say I’m 100% on it. I don’t think it’s Yiddish. I don’t think it’s Russian. I actually think it’s English pronounced with a little bit of an accent, especially New York accent, where R’s at the ends of the word tend not to be pronounced, the lack of vernicity, as they call it. And I think the word is come upper, C-O-M-E-U-P-P-E-R. And this means someone who aspires, is on a fast track. They’re full of ideas and energy. A parvenu or nouveau riche, somebody who’s going places. And sometimes they’re also just called a comer or a coming person. They’re coming into their own. They’re progressing towards a goal or success.

And part of the reason that I think this, that is then in Jewish culture, including and kind of ensconced in the Yiddish language, are a bunch of sayings about how it’s okay to aspire a little bit. It’s okay to have a little bit of, you know, idea of getting ahead of others, but not too much. You know, don’t become the tall poppy, as they say. Don’t become the one crab sticking out of the barrel. And so there’s expressions like better a new millionaire than a bankrupt one or better a well-raised goat than a well-raised pig or better to be a risen spirit than a risen fool.

Oh, I never would have thought that because we thought it meant don’t make a mess.

Well, he may have modified it for his own music, but I think what he was going after was these comeuppers or people full of ideas and energy who were always up to something. They’re always got their hands in something.

Oh, yeah. Right? So what he’s basically saying is don’t start any new projects in this clean house that I just, you know, that I just straightened.

Right. Don’t get any ideas. I just spent hours.

Yeah, don’t get any ideas. Don’t get ahead of yourself.

Okay. All right. Wow. That’s a whole new take on it. Because in Spanish, which is another language I speak, it’s like, no te pasa. Don’t pass yourself, you know. Don’t get ahead of yourself, as we would say in English.

Yeah, don’t get ahead of yourself. Wow. I am so thrilled.

Yeah, so I love your show, and I recommend it to all the people I know who speak all kinds of languages. I teach ESL, so people really want to understand language theirs and other people’s, so it’s perfect. And I thank you for your hard work.

You’re welcome. That’s how we feel as well, Stacey. You take care of yourself now.

All right. Well, thanks.

Yeah, be well. Thank you. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

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