Calling the Kids “Mama” and “Papa”

Hi, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, this is Wasim from Dallas, Texas.

Hi, welcome to the show. What can we do for you?

Thank you. So my question actually isn’t about English, it’s about Arabic.

So I noticed this the other day when I was sitting with my mom and she was, we had some friends over, Indian friends.

And I brought up the sort of concept how in Arabic we have this thing where mothers, fathers, uncles, aunts, just any relatives, they’ll call younger relatives, like I guess their niece, nephew, son, daughter, they’ll call them by their title.

So, for example, my mother will call, my sisters and I will call us Mama, or our dad will call us Baba, which is the Arabic word for dad.

And it’s the same concept for aunts and uncles.

So I was wondering, you know, where this sort of came about, because when we were talking with our Indian friends, they didn’t have anything like that.

And I know for a fact that other Arabic speakers, they have the same sort of concept.

So when you say Indian friends, do you mean subcontinental Indians or Native American Indians?

Subcontinental.

It’s interesting because I had heard that in some parts of the subcontinent that they do also do that.

Really?

Yeah.

But, you know, India is a massive country with hundreds of dialects and lots of subcultures and very strong different identities depending where you are.

So I’m not surprised that it’s not universal.

So what you’re saying, just to recap here, in Arabic, it sounds like the parents are calling the children by the name that the parents themselves are known as.

So father calls the boys by the name that means father.

Mother calls the girls by the name that means mother, so forth.

I know that a lot of our listeners are jumping up and down in their seats right now.

And Martha looks eager with anticipation as well because the same thing happens in Spanish.

You will find this again and again throughout Latin America, I believe also in Spain, where the little kids may be called mommy and puppy, right?

And it’s very similar.

So what happens linguistically is that the word stops meaning one thing and it starts taking on additional meanings.

It basically kind of generalizes as a term of affection and stops being like a gender-based term of affection.

So the same way that I might call my wife honey and I call my son honey or sweetie or whatever, something like that.

Or you might call cutie is, you know, gender unaware.

A man or a woman can be cutie or sugar or all these terms.

And it kind of basically just joins this other group of terms of endearment that don’t have a gender.

Does your family have any explanation for it?

No, I had asked my mom and she kind of just what she said was this is just like how what her parents did, what her uncles, what her aunts, what her grandparents did.

It was just sort of a learned thing that she took on from her parents.

Huh. It’s interesting because I have a friend from Turkey who says that in a way it sort of reminds you of your ancestors as well.

It’s sort of a way of keeping them alive.

Oh, interesting. So the children will become a father and a mother one day.

And so by calling them that, you are kind of basically making small wishes for the future.

Yeah. Yeah. And I think that’s a lovely idea, a lovely tradition.

I sure haven’t seen it in this country among…

I have seen it in small ways in this country.

We have family friends from North Carolina and the mother refers to her little girl as mama.

Is that right?

Yeah, and I have seen it elsewhere, but I’ve never seen it for the little boys.

And as I understand it, it sometimes happens in the American South.

I don’t know how widespread, but I’m sure our Southern listeners will call quickly and let us know.

But I do understand that sometimes it happens.

For the little boys, sometimes I think Bubba and Mama are paired together.

So Bubba takes the place of what otherwise would be Papa or Daddy.

And then I see reports of it possibly happening in Jamaica.

African Americans sometimes will do this as well.

The little kids are known as mama or daddy.

And India, of course, and Filipino culture from the Philippines, possibly.

And I wouldn’t be surprised if we get reports of it happening elsewhere.

It is very widespread in Spanish-speaking cultures and Arabic-speaking cultures.

It’s ringing a vague Yiddish bell for me, too.

Oh, is it?

Yeah.

It’s called the kids’ little girl’s bubbla, right?

Yeah.

Interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah, I just thought it was weird also because it’s the same thing for aunts and uncles.

So my uncle, which the Arabic word for uncle on your mom’s side is chalo, he’ll also call me chalo.

And same thing with my grandparents.

My grandma will call me tata, which is sort of like the Arabic term of endearment for grandmother.

And same thing for my grandpa.

He’ll call me the Arabic word for grandpa.

Well, that seems like a lovely tradition.

Yeah.

One last question before we go.

What variety of Arabic does your family speak?

They speak Palestinian Arabic.

Palestinian.

Okay, very good.

Thank you very much for your call.

This is super interesting.

I know we’re going to get a ton of email on this.

Thank you so much.

Our pleasure.

Okay, thanks.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

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