A Pick’ll Do

You’re listening to A Way with Words, the show about language and how we use it.

I’m Martha Barnette.

And I’m Grant Barrett.

Who’s this guy in a sailor suit coming in off a big ship?

It’s John Chaneski, our quiz guy.

Ahoy.

Ahoy, everybody.

Ahoy, ahoy.

Listen, you know, a few years ago, we did A Way with Words live at the Bell House in Brooklyn, if you remember.

Yeah, great time.

Good audience.

It was fantastic.

I remember there was a Q&A, and someone asked me the classic, where do you get your quiz ideas?

I say that quite often.

But I just look around and I see a word.

I think about its properties, and I use that as a jumping-off point.

And I ask the audience to shout out a word.

And I distinctly remember someone shouted out, pickle.

Now, I remember rhyming pickle, but ever since then I felt like I should have come up with something better.

Well, here we are years later, and I have a quiz based on pickle.

Believe it or not.

It occurred to me that when we want to contract the word will, we use ul.

Like, who will help me move my convertible sofa from the attic to the basement?

Grant will do it.

Grantle, that’s not a word, of course.

But pickle is, as in, I want to strum my guitar, but my fingers are too sensitive.

What will be useful to me?

The answer is a pickle.

A pickle be useful.

Oh, a pickle be useful.

A pickle.

Gotcha.

Okay.

Gotcha.

Okay, good.

Got me.

Now, that’s how these clues work.

I’ll ask you a question about what will be useful, and you will tell me, you’ll tell me what will, what’ll, what’ll be useful.

So it’ll be something all.

Yes, exactly.

And it’ll also be a word.

My friends and I are gearing up for a baseball game.

We’ve got gloves and balls, uniforms, everything, but we’re still missing one vital piece of equipment.

What will be useful for playing baseball?

Battle.

A battle.

Yeah, a battle will be useful.

Very good.

I’m portraying Juliet in a community theater production.

I’m quite nearly bald and Juliet isn’t.

What will be useful for making me look more like a young woman?

A wimple.

A wimp?

We’re going to use a wimp?

No, I don’t think a wimple will help, no.

She went great in that.

Well, it’s not wiggle.

Yes, it is a wiggle.

A wiggle.

Oh, it is a wiggle.

I’m not hearing either word.

It’s twice now.

That’s sexy Juliet.

Yeah, sexy, sexy Juliet.

I have to get across town, and I can’t afford a taxi.

What will be useful to get me to where I want to go?

A bustle to go with your hustle.

Yes, very good.

To go with your wiggle.

To go with my wiggle, yeah.

My front door sticks a bit in the summer.

I need to get out of the house.

What will be the action I perform to get the door to open?

Use a shovel.

A shovel?

A shovel will work, yeah.

You can use a hammer, but a good shovel.

I keep putting this poster up on the wall, and it just keeps falling down.

Now, watch.

See?

I put it on the wall, I let it go, and it falls.

What will be useful to me in keeping this poster on the wall?

A tackle.

A tackle? You think I should just jump on it?

That would do. Okay, I see what you mean.

Yes, a tack. A tackle will work.

Finally, bartenders, waiters, even trivia hosts work very hard at what they do.

What will go a long way towards letting your server know you appreciate them?

A little tipple.

A tipple, yes.

A tipple will help.

Also, if you tipple enough, you’ll probably end up leaving more of a tip, which is really good.

That’s what we like.

So very good, guys.

You got all of the answers in what I call what will.

So congratulations.

Nice job.

Thanks, John. Really appreciate it.

Oh, that was my pleasure. I’ll see you next time.

Thanks, John. Bye-bye.

You can call us to goof with words or talk about slang or grammar or anything else involving language, 877-929-9673, or send your stories about words to words at waywordradio.org.