It Is What It Is

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, my name is Heather from Vista, California.

Hey, Heather.

Hi, Heather.

I was calling to see if you could help me out with a phrase that I’ve been hearing a lot.

Okay.

Well, I moved to California about two years ago from Michigan, and I started hearing this phrase, it is what it is. And I was wondering if you could help me figure out maybe where this came from or why the sudden rise in popularity.

Oh, now, Heather, I want to ask you, how do you feel about that phrase? Does it annoy you?

It’s more like I just notice it a lot.

Okay, good, good. And it seems like people will say it to kind of console or say, oh, well, sorry, there’s nothing we can do about it, but it is what it is.

Bingo, exactly.

Yeah, it’s sort of like the serenity prayer only compacted.

Oh, there we go, right. Give me the serenity to accept the things, whatever. Change, the wisdom.

Yeah, or sort of c’est la vie.

Right, right. Tough beans, whatever.

So you noticed it more after you moved to California. Are you suggesting that you believe it has something to do with being a Californian?

You know, not necessarily. It was about two years ago, and it just looks like I just did a quick search online, and it was about two years when it started being popular. But when I moved to California, that’s when I saw the T-shirts and things that they had this phrase on them.

Interesting.

I’m not sure. I first noticed it coming to prominence in 2004.

Oh, really?

Or 2003 or 2004. That year, the American Dialect Society included it as one of its candidates for Word of the Year, which isn’t always about the word, but sometimes it can be a phrase. And I don’t think it won any great accolades, but it certainly went on notice as being something that people were paying attention to, lexicographers and linguists and so forth.

Yeah, even USA Today had an article about how it’s the most overused sports phrase around.

Right, when was that?

Oh, four.

Oh, four.

Oh, four. But there was a movie in 2001 called It Is What It Is.

Right. And so the phrase is definitely older than that. Now, whether or not it’s had any more prominence in the last couple of years, I can’t say. William Sapphire, may he rest in peace, wrote about it in 2006 in the New York Times. And British linguist David Crystal has also written about it.

And the sum total of what they have to say is really interesting, is that this fits a pattern in English of us finding these shortcut ways to say, you just, as Martha was saying, you just have to accept it because that’s all, there’s nothing that we can do about it. And there’s a bunch of these. David Crystal has a few great examples of it takes what it takes, which sounds familiar to me. Or I’ll be ready when I’m ready, you know?

Yeah, or just whatever.

A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do.

Boys will be boys.

I mean, tell me something new.

I can’t stand the phrase.

If I’m telling you about a problem I have, I don’t want you to say it is what it is.

I want you to help me think of a solution.

Don’t just accept the problem.

I want some help.

Do you think she should be peeving about it?

Oh, you know, I know some people that it really annoys,

And I know some people that use it quite a bit, actually.

But, I mean, I can understand how people can get annoyed by it.

Thank you.

Well, Heather.

Okay.

What can we say?

That’s when you say it is what it is.

What’s done is done.

Thank you so much for calling, Heather.

All right. Thank you very much.

Bye-bye.

Okay. Take care.

Bye.

Que sera, sera.

Yeah, que sera, sera, sera.

Whatever will be, will be.

I like that better.

If someone says c’est la vie, do you find that annoying?

If it’s a fellow feeling kind of c’est la vie,

But I think that it is what it is when I’ve used it.

Yeah, that’s the difference.

It’s not about joining someone else in sympathy and empathy.

Thank you. That’s what I’m trying to say.

It’s about separating yourself and saying, top luck.

That’s what I’m saying.

That’s exactly what I’m saying.

And maybe I just have a different sense of the expression.

Well, you’re generally a positive and upbeat person.

Right.

So I can absolutely see why you don’t want somebody to tell you when you have a legitimate complaint.

It is what it is.

It is what it is.

Right.

Nobody wants to hear that, right?

What you want to hear is, oh, my God, I didn’t know.

Let me solve that problem for you.

That’s exactly it.

And if I say, boy, it’s a bummer that we all have to die, isn’t it?

And you say, c’est la vie.

Well, then I feel like we’ve bonded some.

You know, it’s sort of more like girl talk.

Rather than boy talk.

Yeah, thanks for not making me part of the girls’ club.

Makes me feel taller.

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