Ella Vader Puzzle

You’re listening to A Way with Words, the show about language and how we use it.

I’m Martha Barnette.

And I’m Grant Barrett, and here he is, John Chaneski, our quizist.

Hello, John.

Hey, hi, Grant. Hi, Martha.

Hello, Mr. Chaneski.

I don’t know if you guys heard this old joke that goes, if Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader, she’d be Ella Vader.

Yeah.

Oh.

Now, you know, I don’t know if that would be true. I mean, she already is a leading figure in her field. She’d most likely keep her name, or perhaps in their private life, out of a sense of togetherness. She might be Ella Fitzgerald Vader. He might become Darth Vader Fitzgerald. I’m just saying.

Yeah, right.

Sure.

Yeah.

What’s the deal?

But I was wondering what other romantic blendings might be possible. For example, if film actress Kendrick of Up in the Air married Texas Senator Phil and took his name, she would become the rearranging of one word’s letters to make another word. Anna Graham.

Yeah, Anna Graham. She would be Anna Graham. Anna Kendrick and Phil Graham. That’s very good.

Yeah, nicely done.

Here’s the first. If TV comedian Newhart married TV comedian Betty and took her name, he would become a small bird. Bob White?

Bob White?

That’s Bob White.

Very nice.

If singer Astley of Never Gonna Give You Up married playwright George Bernard and took his name, he would become a human-powered conveyance. Rick Shaw.

Rick Shaw, yes.

If psychologist brothers married sci-fi icon Philip K. and took his name, she would become a video game controller. Joystick, that’s very good. That’s very, very good. That’s right. Very good. A little fun with phonetics there, yeah. Nice.

If TV actress Stapleton of All in the Family married rock singer Vince of Motley Crue and took his name, she would become rather friendly and cheerful. Geneal.

Geneal, yes. Geneal.

If legendary actress Hayworth married Larry from the Three Stooges and took his name, she would become a word meaning to change what a word means. Redefine.

Yes.

Read the phone.

Very good.

Read the phone.

That’s awesome.

These are really good. They should have gotten together. They should get together. Seriously.

If McDonald’s founder Croc married historian Howard of A People’s History of the United States and took his name, he would become a dried grape. Raisin.

Raisin.

Howard Zinn.

I think that’s one where you didn’t have to know either of the names to get the answer. I was thinking John. Ray Kroc.

Yeah.

Yeah, Ray Kroc and Howard Zinn.

Right.

Finally, if former U.S. Vice President Gore married silent film comic Harold and took his name, he would become like two metals that are blended to obtain a desired property. Alloyed.

Alloyed.

Alloyed, yes.

Very nice.

And I hope they are very happy Alloyed in their wedded bliss. Al Gore and Harold Lloyd.

Thank you so much, John.

Thank you.

Nice work, guys.

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