Don from San Mateo, Florida, recalls that when he asked his mother what he was getting for Christmas, she’d reply with: I got you a fastareus. It’s bigger than a breadbox and smaller than an elephant. His father also used fastareus as a placeholder word like doohickey or thingamajig. The word may be related to the Irish words fooster, foostering, and foosterins, all of which have to do with idling about. The expression bigger than a breadbox has a much clearer origin. The idea first popped on national television on January 18, 1953, spoken by panelist Steve Allen on the game show “What’s My Line?” This is part of a complete episode.
Transcript of “Is It Bigger Than a Breadbox?”
Hi, you have A Way with Words.
Hi, my name is Don. I’m calling from San Mateo, Florida.
Hey, Don, welcome to the show. What can we do for you?
Okay, so growing up, whenever Christmas or a birthday was approaching, I would ask my mom, what did she get me for Christmas? And she would reply, I got you a Festeris. And after pressing, she would say that it’s bigger than a bread box and smaller than an elephant.
Wait, Festeris, can you give us your best spelling for that?
The best spelling I’ve come up with is F-A-S-T-A-R-E-U-S. Festeris, and it’s bigger than a bread box and smaller than an elephant. That limits it.
That is so unhelpful.
Yeah, parents are always unwilling to give a precise answer to some nosy children. Did you find out more about Festeris, and did anyone else in your family use it?
My mom heard it from her mom, and then my grandma said that she heard it from her dad, and her dad would use it in everyday instances. Like, the car is broke down, the Festeris is broken. So, like, doohickey or thingamajig.
Right, exactly. So, like, a generic replacement noun.
Okay. The weird thing about fisteris is it reminds me of an Irish word that shows up in English. Not that common in dialects in the UK. But the verb in English is fooster. And you can also have foostering or the noun foosterings, which means fuss or bustle or fluster. And they’re all about fussing or fidgeting or, you know, doing purposeless idle actions, fumbling about. And I just wonder if that’s what the word originally meant, if maybe it did come from Irish, you know, Irish Gaelic and meant, you know, we’re not doing much of anything. But I’m going to give you a complicated word that sounds like Latin.
Right, right. But the bigger than a bread box and smaller than an elephant. Now, that one’s got quite a pedigree. It comes from a famous television show and television show host. The show is What’s My Line? And the host was Steve Allen. And in his autobiography, he talks about the day he was first used the phrase, January 18th, 1953. He’s the guy who coined it, apparently, and he’s the guy who popularized it. And it was like one of his calling card expressions because after he said, you know, when he was trying to narrow down a bunch of particulars, after he asked somebody, you know, is it bigger than a bread box? People were so tickled by the expression and began to tease him about it. And it became this kind of pat-set phrase for a generation. So that when you played 20 questions with your friends or family, you wouldn’t start with, is it animal, vegetable, or mineral? You would say, is it bigger than a bread box?
Oh, okay. And so the last part about, and smaller than elephant, I think is an innovation, a new add-on. But it makes it so much even better, I think. Bigger than a bread box and smaller than an elephant. That’s only 10 or 15 billion things.
Exactly. Yeah, Don, did your family have a bread box?
Ours didn’t. We just put the rainbow bread on down.
No, we did not. And do you know what one is? Do you know what a bread box is?
Oh, yeah. I know what a bread box is for sure.
All right. So just tell us. So for those who don’t, because we’ve got all generations and all ages on the line. Bread box is a little bit bigger than a loaf of bread. Has a door or a slide that opens up, keeps your bread from your critters.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, you don’t want the mice or ants in there. It also keeps it fresh. But that’s what we know about those expressions. I hope it was helpful, Don.
Absolutely. That was awesome. I love the show. I listen to it all the time.
Oh, it’s our pleasure.
Yeah, call us again sometime.
Absolutely. Thank you so much.
Bye-bye.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
