Upsitting once meant the first occasion when a new mother sat up to receive visitors after childbirth and confinement, sometimes with food and a feast. William Charles Baldwin’s 1863 African Hunting, From Natal to Zambesi records another use among Boers in South Africa: a young woman invited to upsit returned after the household retired, bringing a candle whose length showed how much time she was willing to spend whispering with her suitor. When the candle burned out, he had to leave. This is part of a complete episode.
Transcript of ““Upsitting” Marked a New Mother’s First Formal Company After Childbirth”
You’re listening to A Way with Words, a show about language and how we use it. I’m Grant Barrett.
And I’m Martha Barnette. Grant, I’ve been dictionary diving again.
Backstroke and the letter M or something?
Yep, yep, big jackknife right into the letter U.
The letter U.
Yep.
And what did you find?
I found the coolest word, upsitting.
Okay, let me guess.
Okay.
Somebody has died and you’re sitting up with them at night.
Good guess, but no.
What is it?
No.
Well, the archaic use of it back as far as the 16th century is, upsitting is the first time a woman sits up to receive company after having a baby, after her period of confinement.
Isn’t that nice?
I see.
This is when we were more formal about these things.
Yeah.
Rather than seeing she has a baby on Monday and goes to yoga on Tuesday.
Exactly.
Yes.
It was more of an occasion.
And sometimes, you know, people would bring a lot of food and there would be a feast.
So an upsitting.
She’s got the beautiful motherly glow, the sweet little new babies nearby.
Or maybe the postpartum blues.
I don’t know.
I don’t know, but it’s an occasion, and I love the notion of it being an occasion.
You would attend an upsitting or get invited to an upsitting.
Yes, yes, or that day would have been her upsitting.
And there’s one more use of upsitting that really fascinated me.
This has to do with a type of dating practice among the Boers in South Africa in the 1800s.
I can’t even think.
Is this where you sit with the one you’re wooing in public sight of the parents of the chaperone or something?
More or less.
You’re very, very close.
Well, let me just read you this description from a book by William Charles Baldwin.
He published this in 1863.
It’s called African Hunting from Natal to the Zambezi.
And he has this description of upsitting in that part of the world.
He writes, if you admire anyone in particular, you take the first opportunity that presents itself of asking her to upsit.
Should this be accorded, when the old people and all the rest of the household have retired, a curtain frequently being all the partition between the sitting and the bedrooms, the chosen one again appears with a candle, short or long, according as she fancies you or otherwise.
And remains as long as that burns, all conversation being carried on in whispers, and the fair one being obliged to sit very close and talk very low for fear of disturbing the inmates on the other side of the curtain.
So the candle, long candle means I really like you.
Yeah, stick around, dude.
And then the guy is in charge of making sure that the candle is always trimmed, that it doesn’t flicker or flare, get into a draft, because as soon as the candle goes out, he’s got to leave.
Isn’t that great?
That’s great.
Yeah, and Baldwin writes, I’ve been present, stretched on the floor on a blanket, asleep apparently, no doubt, when two upsittings have been going on at opposite corners of a large room.
All still is the grave, but the subdued whisperings of the happy pears.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, and it sounds really romantic.
Doesn’t it?
Today we would probably say, I’ve only got 20% charge on my phone.
I can’t stay long.
That’s the equivalent of the short candle, right?
Exactly.
You were supposed to bring a phone charger, dude.
That’s nice.
Dictionary diving has rewards.
Dictionary diving, right?
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