Spot the Fake Slang

You’re listening to A Way with Words. I’m Grant Barrett.

And I’m Martha Barnette, and it’s time for our weekly slang challenge, where we try to stump a member of the National Puzzlers League.

Today’s contestant is Laura Block from San Francisco.

Hello, Laura.

Hello, Grant.

How are you doing?

Good.

What are you doing in San Francisco?

I am responsible for a OB-GYN residency training program at UCSF.

That sounds complicated, like a lot of work.

It is a lot of work, but I have fabulous doctors I work with, and the residents are amazing.

I bet you pick up lots of slang in your work. Do you have a slang word for us from your work or from life?

Well, I do have work slang words, but the one that my favorite one is actually a familial one.

Oh, let’s hear it.

And it is the muffin game.

The muffin game.

Have you ever heard of the muffin game?

No, I don’t know the muffin game.

What it is, is it basically, it is at the end of a sports season when two teams are playing and the outcome has no bearing on the standings or who’s going to make the playoffs.

And is basically a throwaway game that nobody cares about.

In our family, we call it a muffin game.

Because?

A couple years ago, I asked my brothers, why is this called a muffin game? I’ve never known.

And apparently, I’m the youngest of the family. Apparently when one of my brothers was much younger, my father said to him, oh, no, it’s a nothing game. It’s a nothing game. Don’t care about it.

And he heard muffin game.

That’s funny.

Nice.

Love those misunderstood words, misheard words.

Exactly.

Well, are you ready to play a slang quiz?

Absolutely.

All right, I’m going to give you the rules. They’re pretty easy.

The only thing that you have to do is figure out which of the two things that I’m describing is the correct one.

I’ll give you a clue that describes them, and you pick one.

All right?

All right, sounds good.

If you need some help, just ask Martha. She’s very chatty.

Excellent.

All right, here we go with the first clue.

You can get the willies, the heebie-jeebies, and the screaming memes. But what other kind of nervous freakout can you have if you speak British English?

Is it A, the belching withers, or B, the screaming abdabs?

Wow. Those are fabulous.

Thank you. I wrote one of them myself.

Excellent. The one that’s not the correct answer, I take it.

That’s right. That’s really the fun part of the job.

Okay, Martha, you know Grant much better than I do.

Laura, I’m thinking that ab-dab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab-ab might.

So is it the belching withers? Is it the belching withers or the screaming ab-dabs?

I would go with the belching.

Oh, you would? You would go with the belching?

Because we already have the screaming memes, so it’s probably another screaming word would be my guess.

Ooh.

Ooh.

Well, we can disagree.

All right.

Okay.

So Laura belches when she’s flustered.

Exactly.

Okay.

You can ask Matt.

So you’re picking the Belching Withers?

Absolutely.

Oh, I’m sorry. It’s the Screaming Ab Dabs.

Oh, really?

Yes, it is.

And actually it’s sometimes called…

Which means that you came up with the Belching Withers.

That’s right.

You’re busted, Barrett.

You’re busted.

You’re right.

The Screaming Ab Dabs are sometimes called the Screaming Hab Dabs with an H at the beginning.

And it dates back to about the middle of the last century.

The origins are unknown.

My speculation is that it’s named after the sound of someone gibbering in fear.

You go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, like that.

That’s just my…

That’s what I was trying to do, but I didn’t do it very well.

No, yeah, it’s a pretty good rendition.

Yeah.

All right, let’s try the next one.

Are you ready?

Okay.

Laura, here it is.

Some people call Americans yanks. Some call them gringos. But what do Australians call them?

Is it A, septics, S-E-P-T-I-C-S, or B, songbirds, S-O-N-G-B-I-R-D-S?

Oh, songbirds, clearly.

Oh, it is? Why would that be?

Beautifully compared to the down under, our voices are so clear and have that fabulous American accent. We’ve clearly songbirds.

Millions of Australians unsubscribed to our podcast as we speak.

What? Come on, it has to be songbirds. Come on.

Oh, does it?

Well, it’s sort of like snowbirds, only we talk a lot.

I don’t know.

It’s actually septics. And in its rhyming slang, septic is from septic tank, which rhymes with yank.

Oh, my gosh.

Yeah.

You’ll even find it in the titles of books and newspaper columns and thrown around freely in public.

It’s not particularly pejorative, although there’s a little bit of a negative mark there, simply because it is about a septic tank.

Yeah.

Laura, how do you know that I’m going to hear about it? I’m going to see it all over the place now whenever I read the newspaper.

Yes.

That’s right.

Yes, it’s definitely one of those terms.

That’s right.

You’ll be watching Kath and Kim, the original Australian version, and it’ll come up every other scene.

Yeah, you and I both, we’re both going to be wincing every time we hear the word septic.

Exactly.

Well, Laura, I’ve got to tell you, though, it’s always fun to play with somebody who has your energy.

It’s really nice.

Excellent.

This was fun.

Thank you for playing with us today.

Bye-bye.

Yeah, thanks, Laura.

All right, take care.

Bye.

Bye-bye.

Well, if you have a question for us about words or language or grammar or slang, give us a call at numbers 1-877-929-9673.

Or you can send us an email to words@waywordradio.org.