How Should a High School Teacher Handle Profanity in the Classroom?

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, Martha. Hi, Grant. This is Dane. I’m calling from Los Angeles, California.

Hi, Dane. Welcome to the show. What can we do for you?

Well, I’m a high school teacher in Los Angeles here, and a lot of teachers at staff meetings and around campus have different opinions about high schoolers and teenagers using profanity.

And I thought, I know Grant has a child who’s close to high school age, and you guys have studied language, and I was wondering what your guys’ opinion was about teenagers using profanity as they develop their language and sort of their own personal vocabulary.

And, Dane, do you mean using it in the classroom or with each other around the hall or what?

I mean profanity in a broad context, but teachers definitely have different rules varying based on how they hear students use it.

I think it’s sort of unavoidable in some aspects of students socially within their friend groups.

But I know it also bleeds into the classroom context as well.

And teachers have different rules about how they enforce that in their own rooms.

And I was hoping to see if maybe there was some sort of consensus or advice that you could give.

So the next time the topic comes up, maybe I have something to contribute.

You tipped us off to an important thing here.

It sounds like teachers each have their own different levels of acceptance in each classroom.

So these kids are having to negotiate multiple relationships with adults where maybe it’s allowed at home or allowed with a certain uncle or family friend.

And one teacher, maybe the gym coach, is a little more forgiving and the science teacher isn’t.

I don’t mean to stereotype professions, but I’m just saying.

And so they’ve got to negotiate that.

And they’re at a point in their life where they’re negotiating everything, figuring out who they are and what they want to become and what friends are like and what romance is about.

And it’s a real awkward time for them.

So the more of this decision-making we can make easy for them, the better off we’re all going to be.

So here’s what happens in my house.

My son is allowed to curse, but he’s only allowed to curse if it’s not about other people.

And he cannot use offensive language about individuals, and he never does.

So it can’t be about insulting or slurs against people.

It can’t be about criticizing somebody in a way that makes them feel diminished or small.

And we definitely follow the rule about there’s no punching down.

By that I mean you do not curse in a way that goes after people who are already in a bad position.

It has to be about momentary anger, like darn it, or shoot, that sort of thing.

We do allow emphatic cursing.

So you can say this is a gall darn terrible situation, something like that.

But none of the rest of it really suits him, fortunately.

He doesn’t really feel the need to express himself through obscene language.

Dane, I’m wondering, are there guidelines provided by your school district?

Our school site has certain behavior expectations, but profanity is just sort of lumped in, I think, and maybe more draconian of just don’t allow it, which I think neglects what Grant was just saying, that there’s different uses and different types and applications of profane language.

And that’s why I’ve sort of disagreed with maybe the fundamentalism of it of just absolute no’s versus absolute yes’s and neglecting the gray area there.

Yeah, there’s a whole range of words.

I mean, is it okay to say sucks?

Right, exactly.

With schools and situations like that, because there are all these different standards for all the different adults in their lives, you really do have to do a black and white situation.

You just pretty much say no obscene language, period, because you don’t want to spend your time negotiating.

Is this okay? Is that okay?

You just say no.

And you acknowledge that elsewhere the rules might be different.

You just say, in this place, in this time, with these people, there’s no obscenity.

There’s no taboo language. None.

And it’s just easier for the kids to negotiate, and they don’t have to think about it.

They just say, oh, yeah, no, I’m not supposed to say that.

And they move on.

And at home it might be different, or after school, hanging out with their friends, it might be different.

But simplicity is the key here.

In my house, our rules actually are organic, and they’ve developed over the years.

I remember when my son was a little bitty, he stubbed his toe, and he said one of the four-letter words that he’d heard from me.

And I was like, oh, yeah, I need to work on this.

I need to figure out the relationship he’s going to have with this part of our language.

And we’ve worked on it.

And also that means it’s not something that happens quickly.

You negotiate it over time, and it changes.

The rule that you follow about profanity when you’re 10 is not the same one you should be following when you’re 20 or 30 or 80.

Dane, I’m also wondering about enforcing the rules.

I mean, what kind of consequences do students at your school face if they transgress?

Generally, it’s just a verbal correction of watch your language or watch your mouth.

But I think to touch on what Grant was saying about using it directed at other people, that opens up a lot of discussion about bullying or harassment.

Sure.

And that’s treated a lot more seriously with suspensions or referrals and whatnot.

Frankly, adults don’t always see the difference between those different kinds of taboo language.

I prefer that term over obscenity and cursing, by the way, because we are talking about more than just the words that become stigmatized.

We’re talking about stuff that, because of its meaning and its cultural implications, carries a lot of baggage.

And so that’s why you avoid some of this stuff.

So this is a really complicated topic.

Dane, I appreciate you posing this question to us because it’s important to have the discussion and so people can come to an agreement rather than outside of the school just assuming that the world needs to behave as it does inside the school.

These are different arenas.

Yeah, it sounds like lots of opportunities for teachable moments there.

Sure, yeah.

Definitely, definitely.

I appreciate you guys that give me some great advice and some great insight into how I can bring this subject up with my fellow teachers and with my students.

Yeah, absolutely.

Thank you.

And again, let us know how this evolves at your school.

We’re really interested in your story and how this plays out, okay?

I will keep you guys abreast.

Thank you very much.

It’s been a dream come true.

Take care.

Thanks, Dean.

Bye-bye.

Bye.

Have a good one.

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