The Humans of New York series of portraits and quotations includes one subject’s wise observation about how a single offhand remark can change a life. This is part of a complete episode.
Transcript of “Offhand Remarks Have Lasting Effects”
You’re listening to A Way with Words, the show about language and how we use it. I’m Grant Barrett.
And I’m Martha Barnette. In his book Humans of New York, Brandon Stanton interviewed a man who said something that I think is perfect for our show. It’s about language. He said, “I’m learning to be more careful with my words. Words that seem meaningless at the time can end up having a lot of power. Seeds that you didn’t even intend to plant can fall off you and start growing in people.” That’s perfect, right? Yes. And who said that? Yes. Did I get a name? No, I didn’t get a name. Oh, that’s wonderful. And was that from the book or the Facebook or? It was from the book.
And you see this as a parent, or if you’re around young kids, say, nieces and nephews, grandkids, that something slips out of your mouth and then you hear it come out of theirs. I’m not just talking about the four letter words, but anything that you say and the ideas behind it just is loaded right up into their brains and it becomes a part of how they think and who they are.
You know what? I had that strange experience. I was in New York. I was traveling. I was in the airport. And a woman I hadn’t seen in a very long time since college came up to me. And I didn’t recognize her at first. And she reintroduced herself. And I remembered who she was and how we’d met. And we were, you know, not close friends in college, but we were friends of friends. And she said, “I did the thing that you said I should do.” And I was like, “I don’t.” And how is jail? I don’t know. That was jail.
And, you know, she said, “You told me that I needed to, you know, that I was unsure of my degree program.” And I don’t want to be too specific because I don’t want to talk about our business too clearly on the air. But she said, “You told me that the degree program that I wanted to do didn’t sound like me. And that the other thing that I thought was a hobby, you said it sounded exactly like me. And I might look into that again and do that thing.” She says, “I’m doing it. I’m fully degreed. I got my master’s. I’m working on my doctorate. I started internships. I’m doing the whole thing.” And she says, “You did that for me.” And I was like stunned and amazed and really happy for her and delighted to have that connection. And it perfectly illustrates exactly what Humans of New York just said to us.
Yeah. Yeah. You never know the effect of your words. You never know. Yeah. Tell us about a time that somebody changed you or changed your life with their words. 877-929-9673.
