More than Seven Dwarfs Word Game

You’re listening to A Way with Words, the show about language and how we use it.

I’m Martha Barnette.

And I’m Grant Barrett, and we’re joined by John Janeski, our quiz guy in New York City.

Hi, John.

Hi, Grant.

Hi, Martha.

Hi, John.

Now, it’s a pretty well-known trivia chestnut that Walt Disney considered many, many more names for Snow White’s Seven Dwarfs. Did you know that?

No, really?

Is this conceit or is this truth?

No, this is absolutely true. They have notes. They have notes. I kid you not. The list includes names like Nifty, Dirty, Goopy, Wheezy, and Chesty. There’s about 40 of them.

Wow.

I don’t even want to think about what a dwarf named Goopy would be like.

Goopy.

Walt wanted the dwarf’s personalities to match their names, like Grumpy and Happy. And looking at the list, I can see why most of these didn’t make the cut.

But then why stop at seven?

I think Disney stopped too soon and neglected to add wordplay into the mix. For example, what about a dwarf who’s very pious and contemplative? Maybe one that took a vow of poverty and or silence. What would his name be?

Monkey? I don’t know.

Yeah, Monkey. Right, Monkey.

Dopey is silent. Maybe he’s Monkey. I don’t know. As you can see, the name also means something else. So if you can’t guess the dwarf name from the following clues, I can tell you what all else it could mean.

Got it?

All right.

Now, unlike Snow White’s dwarfs, none of our dwarf names are actually adjectives. Now, we never found out the dwarf’s background, so maybe there could have been one from Southeast Europe, maybe one from around Ankara or Istanbul.

Turkey.

Turkey.

Turkey, right. It was very likely partial to large birds, or maybe he had a fleshy wattle, perhaps?

Yeah.

Now, we know the dwarfs were minors, but who’s to say they couldn’t have other jobs? Maybe one of them was an agent who would post money so that someone in pretrial detention could be released in exchange for a fee.

Bailey?

Bailey, right, right. Yeah, you could probably find him patrolling the outer courtyard of a castle, probably.

The seven dwarfs wore those sort of floppy hats, but suppose there was one that was more geometrically inclined, and he insisted that his hat be of a similar shape but tapered smoothly to a sharp apex. What do you think?

Pointy?

No, not pointy.

How about TP?

Not TP, but all these are pretty good, yeah. It’s the kind of headwear you might associate with someone who would be called Dopey.

Coney?

Coney, yes.

Oh, Coney.

Coney.

Yes, exactly. He may have been partial to rabbits or a seaside amusement park in Brooklyn.

Yeah, okay.

We’re up to speed now.

Good.

Oh, and while Doc was very smart, and even Dopey still had a degree in geology, there must have been at least one dwarf who didn’t make the grade. You know, maybe our dwarf failed the test.

Flunky?

Flunky, yes.

Oh, flunky. That would force him to act as a henchman for more accomplished dwarfs.

There we go.

Similarly, one of our dwarfs could have been a stevedore or a longshoreman and distinguished himself by the tool of his trade, a piece of metal with a handle.

Forklifty.

No.

I’m thinking a little more old-fashioned than forklifty.

Crowbar-y.

Leaver-y.

No, it’s a curved piece of metal with a handle.

Hookie.

Hookie, that’s him, yes. Unlike, yeah. Unlike Flunky, instead of failing, this guy just never showed up.

Those are our dwarfs, guys, and that’s pretty good.

Well, thanks for the quiz, John. We really appreciate it.

Thanks, John.

We’ll talk to you next week.

My pleasure.

Talk to you then.

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