Literary Character Quiz

You’re listening to A Way with Words. I’m Grant Barrett.

And I’m Martha Barnette. And we’re joined now by our quiz guide, John Chaneski. Hello, John.

Hello, Martha. Hello, Grant.

Hiya, John. What’s cooking?

Well, you know, I’m getting ready to go to the National Book Awards ceremony in a couple weeks. The finalists have already been announced, and I get to go because, as you know, my wife was one of the judges in nonfiction. And, oh, I’m all excited. And Patti Smith is one of the nominees. I’m going to get to meet her and a whole bunch of other people.

Yeah, yeah, it should be cool.

I hope she’ll be there.

I should think she would be.

You know, we did a quiz about nonfiction a little while ago.

Yeah.

And I have one here about novels. So you want to try it?

Oh, sure.

Sure.

Why not, since we’re here. Can you tell me who is being described in the passages of literature that I’ve excerpted here?

Okay.

-oh.

Okay. I’ll give you some clues. Okay, here’s the first one. In height, he was rather over six feet and so excessively lean that he seemed to be considerably taller. His eyes were sharp and piercing, save during those intervals of torpor, to which I have alluded. And his thin, hawk-like nose gave his whole expression.

Sherlock Holmes.

Yes, Sherlock Holmes.

Nice.

Nice work. An air of alertness and decision. The word torpor gave it away.

Yeah.

That’s from A Study in Scarlet by Arthur Conan Doyle.

Nice.

Nice. Off to a good start. Here’s the next one. For all her chic thinness, she had an almost breakfast cereal air of health. A soap and lemon cleanness, a rough pink darkening in the cheeks. Her mouth was large, her nose upturned. A pair of dark glasses blotted out her eyes. It was a face beyond childhood, yet this side of belonging to a woman. I thought her anywhere between 16 and 30. As it turned out, she was shy two months of her 19th birthday. That’s all I’m going to give you.

I was going to say Nabokov.

Yeah, I was going to say Lolita, but…

No.

That age is wrong.

Yeah.

Yeah. I’ll tell you, one of the words in the title of the book is actually in this first line. For all her chic thinness, she had an almost breakfast cereal air of health.

Breakfast?

Mm—

At?

Yes.

Tiffany’s?

Yes.

Do you know the character?

What is it?

Is it Holly Golightly?

It is Holly Golightly. Very good. From Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Truman Capote’s work.

Here’s the next one. Our gentleman was approximately 50 years old. His complexion was weathered, his flesh scrawny, his face gaunt, and he was a very early riser and a great lover of the hunt.

Our gentleman. This is, by the way, translated from the Spanish?

Oh.

Is it Don Quixote?

Yes, it is Don Quixote. Some claim that his family name was Quijada or Quesada, for there is a certain amount of disagreement among the authors. I would have given it away if you could.

Yeah, but I wouldn’t quite go that far.

Here’s the next one. A squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner, hard and sharp as flint, from which no steel had ever struck out generous fire, secret and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster. The cold from within him froze his old features, nipped his pointed nose, shriveled his cheek, stiffened his gait, made his eyes red, his thin lips blue, and spoke out shrewdly in his grating voice.

Was that from A Christmas Carol?

Yes.

Scrooge?

Ebenezer Scrooge. A frosty rhyme was on his head, on his eyebrows, on his wiry chin. He carried his own low temperature always about with him. He iced his office in the dog days and didn’t thaw it one degree at Christmas.

Nice.

That’s Ebony’s of Scrooge.

Very good.

Thank you, Mr. Dickens.

Here’s the next one. An old man with a staff. He had a tall, pointed blue hat, a long gray cloak.

Gandalf the Gray.

Very good.

Gandalf the Gray. Mithra and Deer. And you know where this description is from?

Is it from The Hobbit?

It’s from The Hobbit, yes. Very good.

Here’s the next one. Very tall, thin, and brown, and reminded one of a cult, for she never seemed to know what to do with her long limbs, which were very much in her way. She had a decided mouth, a comical nose, and sharp gray eyes which appeared to see everything and were by turns fierce, funny, or thoughtful. Her long, thick hair was her one beauty, but it was usually bundled into a net to be out of the way.

Any guesses?

I don’t know, one of Jane Austen’s characters or something.

I was thinking Charlotte Bronte or something.

I don’t know. I have no idea.

Yeah, this one’s probably one of the toughest ones. I’ll give you a little more. Round shoulders had Joe, big hands and feet.

Oh, from Little Women.

Yes, Joe March from Little Women. Very good. I hope you get this one. This is funny. He was roughly humanoid in appearance, except for the extra head and third arm.

Is that Zephyr Bibelbrox?

It is Zephyr Bibelbrox from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. I didn’t even manage to mention his fair, tousled hair stuck out in random directions. His blue eyes glinted with something completely unidentifiable, and his chins were almost always unshaven. And for those of you in the Far Galaxies, the secret is to bang the rocks together, guys!

Glad there are fans in the booth.

Okay, here’s the last one. He was a lovely boy, clad in skeleton leaves and the juices that ooze out of trees. But the most entrancing thing about him was that he had all his first teeth.

It’s not Maugly, is it?

No. When he saw she was a grown-up, he gnashed the little pearls at her. And he would only ever have all his first teeth.

Oh, Peter Pan.

Yes, Peter Pan, little boy who never grew up. Well, that was great. You guys were fantastic. Grant ate my lunch on that quiz. You know, I was just making up for all those times when Martha carries the weight and I just recline on the lounger here.

Oh, my gosh.

That was tough, but fun. Go read a book, everyone. Go read one of these books. If you want to talk about books in writing or language, grammar, slang, give us a call. 1-877-929-9673. You can always find us on Facebook. We’re there under the username WayWord. And you can email us at words@waywordradio.org.