Label-Agnostics

Hi, you have A Way with Words.

Hello, this is Jim from Mineral, Virginia.

So this is Martha.

This is Martha.

What’s up?

Martha, I have a question.

My friend and I are talking, and she is getting ready to travel off somewhere, and she’s trying to decide what to pack, whether to pack for hot weather, cold weather, whether to take some winter clothes.

And I looked at her and I said, well, you know, if it’s wintertime, I’ll take my khakis and a couple of knit shirts. If it’s hot, I’ll take my khakis and a couple knit shirts. If it’s fall, I’ll take my khakis and a couple knit shirts.

And she laughed, and she said, well, yes, but I’m a clothes horse. And my question then to her was, well, what’s that make me? And we couldn’t answer that.

So you’re a guy who just dresses average, or you dress poorly?

I would say average.

Okay.

It works for school, and it’s what I wear.

All right.

But you’re not overly concerned with the latest fashions or looking your best?

No, no.

And what kind of shoes?

Nice leather shoes.

Nice leather shoes, okay.

You can always tell a man about his shoes and his watch, right?

Right.

Which is why I go barefoot and don’t wear a watch.

No.

But you know what a clothes horse is, first of all, right?

Yeah, well, I went and looked up. It’s a drying rack.

That’s right.

Or it’s someone who does a good job of wearing clothes.

Right.

It’s somebody who is more about the clothes and the fashion, probably too much so. It seems to be the only thing that they care about is having the latest clothes or the best labels or the most expensive things.

But the opposite of a clothes horse is a tough one because I wouldn’t say that you are the opposite of a clothes horse. I would say that a poor dresser, someone who dresses poorly, is the opposite of a clothes horse. You’re kind of in the middle there somewhere.

So you’re just a regular guy.

Okay.

So my answer is I’m just a regular guy.

Yeah.

I mean, I have to admit, I’m kind of the same way. Once I found stuff that worked for me, as long as they continue to manufacture it, I’m going to wear it.

Right?

I don’t have any need to go buying the latest whatever.

Right.

None of the dresses fit me anyway.

So you’re not a fashion victim. You’re a fashion survivor.

Oh, maybe.

Does that work?

No.

Okay.

Avoider?

Avoider.

Avoider.

Ooh, maybe.

Or how about clothes beast of burden?

Nah.

Nah.

Okay.

Let’s go back to your question, what’s the opposite of clothes horse?

Most of the terms that I know that are even remotely opposite of that are really negative. The only mild one that I can think of, DWI, and it means dressed without instructions.

Oh.

I get some of those.

But it’s not really that positive, and it’s not that well-known, and it was kind of a blip on the slang history. It wasn’t really, it was nothing that stuck.

But Jim could claim that, you know?

He could.

Reclaim that word and use it as his own.

I like DWI.

You could also call yourself label blind.

Label blind.

Label blind.

Or label agnostic.

I like that one better.

Well, that’s it, maybe.

A label agnostic.

Khaki-dressed man.

I think label agnostic is probably the best.

You like that the best?

That’s pretty good.

Okay.

Yeah.

Well, Jim, I think that you’re not alone, that there are other people out there who might let us know what they call themselves, because you can’t be the only one.

I’d be interested in hearing that one.

Well, let’s see what happens.

All right.

We’ll put the call out.

Okay.

All right.

Thanks much.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Thank you.

Give us a call, 1-877-929-9673, or send an email to words@waywordradio.org.