Abilene Paradox

You’re listening to A Way with Words, the show about language and how we use it. I’m Grant Barrett.

And I’m Martha Barnette. I learned a handy new term the other day, the Abilene Paradox.

As in Abilene, Texas?

As in Abilene, Texas. There’s a story behind it. It really happens. So picture this.

It’s a hot, dusty summer day in small town West Texas. And there’s a married couple and their in-laws, and they’re sitting out on a porch and they’re running a fan and sipping lemonade, just trying to keep cool. And there’s nothing really much to do except sit there and play a lazy game of dominoes, just wiping the sweat from your brow. And at some point, the father-in-law pipes up with, “Let’s get in the car and go to Abilene and have dinner in the cafeteria.” So it’s 53 miles away. It’s this hot, dusty afternoon in a car with no air conditioning. And the daughter chimes in, “Oh, it sounds like a great idea.” She asks her husband what he thinks. Husband says, “Sounds good, I just hope your mother wants to go.” The mother-in-law says, “Of course I want to go. I haven’t been to Abilene in a long time.” So they all pile into the car, and it’s miserable. It’s just awful. The whole trip, they’re sweating. The cafeteria food is just dreadful. There’s a thin film of dust over everything. And four hours later, they’re back on that porch. They’re hot and exhausted, sitting in front of the fan, trying to keep cool. And after a long silence, the son-in-law is trying to be sociable. So he pipes up with, “That was a great trip, wasn’t it?” And the mother-in-law says, “Well, I just went along because the three of you were so enthusiastic.” And it turns out nobody wanted to go to Abilene, but the guy… And then the guy who suggested it in the first place says, “I never wanted to go. I just thought you might be bored.” Been there. Exactly. Exactly. And now there’s a term for it because the son-in-law was Jerry B. Harvey, who was a professor of management science at George Washington University.

And in 1974, he coined the term Abilene Paradox to describe that phenomenon where a group makes a collective decision that’s counter to the thoughts and feelings of all the individual members because everybody thinks their own preferences are the ones that nobody else has.

So it stems from this breakdown of communication where no one wants to rock the boat. And it’s something that in business school now they teach you to watch out for.

I really appreciate having a term for that, the Abilene Paradox.

Yeah, me too.

Because I had that happen to me recently.

Yeah, a group full of people are being so polite. Maybe you don’t know each other very well or you’re all a little passive aggressive or you don’t really care all that much. It’s just when you all finally get to the old buffet place, you’re like, “Yeah, no, the mushy peas weren’t what I had in mind.”

Yeah, I didn’t want to go. I just went along with you guys. I’d have been happy with the sandwich and a little bit of Netflix. Thanks.

Oh, well, from Abilene to Augusta, give us a call, 877-929-9673.

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