2 questions:In a show I just listened to, Grant said that it is common for males of many cultures to call each other by their last names, and that this is uncommon in females. I was wondering if the male phenomenon occurs in cultures in which women keep their own last names when they marry. Is their a word for language usage that is culturally specific?
Joy, I don't know of such a word and I don't know if women who keep their last names are more likely to call each other by their last names. I'll try to find this out, but it could take much time. Look for a follow-up here.
I'd agree that that's a tough one, Joy. In the discussion on the show, all of us were speaking pretty much anecdotally. I've had a couple of women approach me since the show aired and insist that everyone in their college sorority went by last names, so go figure. 🙂
The sorority link doesn't surprise me. I think of that section of the population being very competitive socially and the last name only practice is also used in sports and the military- two other competitive groups. The only exposure to this that I've had in my life was growing up in the boy scouts which, strangely, was a socially competitive experience for a lot of the guys who were trying to 'fit in.' I think the last name only practice is a little de-humanizing to the person and poises the user in a superior position socially, even if very subtly.
This comment relates my experience growing up. I recall first being called Redd when I was about 10 by an adult (not a peer). It seemed to me to be part of growing up and a small right of passage. It identified me with my family and father.
I speculate that it might be associated with a common practice of inferiors being called by their first names. For example, teachers are called by title and name (Mrs. Smith) while she calls a student by his first name (Jimmy): in 19th century Britian, the butler, Jeeves, called his employer, Mr. Blair: or, in the Antebellum South, slave Tom called his owner, Master Jefferson.
The missing titles among young males may be due to not granting higher status to one's peers. Informality might also require it.
All of the above deals only with males, but Antebellum South may also illustrate a difference for females. In Gone With the Wind, I believe the slaves addressed their mistress as Miss Scarlet.
Possibly related are offensive words which signify or indicate inferiority. 'Boy' is offensive to the black man and 'Girl' is offensive to the feminist.
Emmett "my friends get to call me Dr. Redd no more than once" Redd