What is a Ms, who is asked to stand up with the bride and does not want her marital status known, to do?
Emmett
"Mugwump of Honor". That'll l'arn 'er.
She's a "bride's maid" geeez. I really don't see any issues here. Let her define herself should she so choose. That's like renaming a water utility "manhole" a "personhole." Political correctness can get a bit clumsy sometimes, and really mangle the language.
Umm . . . "Maiden of Honor"? I thought that was the word for the best woman of the bride if she was unmarried. Why should that not apply for the inscrutable or gay-but-unmarried maid of honor? (By the way, for the married lesbian in our states that thankfully recognize it, it should be Maid-of-Honor, in my opinion)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but the original question asked about someone who "stands up" with the bride, and there can be any number of those, all of which I believe are called "bride's maids." Only one of them is designated "of honor" ... usually the closest friend, or perhaps a sister.
This from a guy who never really went through the whole formal process. My wife and I were married by a JP up in Vegas, and only two witnesses were needed (my wife's parents). That piece of paper got us free champagne at any casino we visited.
In an amazing twist of fate (or would this better be called a "synchronicity" or perhaps "karma"), our $50 filing fee was covered later that night when my wife hit a $50 jackpot on a slot machine. We cashed it in for a crisp Grant, and she still has it in her scrapbook along with some photos of the event.