Is it correct to say “Do not hesitate to contact me or Jake if you have any questions,†or should it be “Do not hesitate to contact Jake or me if you have any questions,†or are both acceptable, or are both wrong?
I have always been taught that, except in unusual circumstances, someone else's name goes before I or me when used in conjunction. The only reason I have ever been given is that it is polite. So you have made me wonder if that really is the only reason. Does grammar have nothing to do with this? If I chose to be impolite may I put I or me first? If you did not consider manners, it would be technically correct to put either first.
Either one is grammatical. Consider a situation in which you prefer that the contact be to you, but you allow for Jake. In that case you could nuance by putting "me" first.
I was always taught that the polite order for such lists is second person(s) first; third person(s) second; first person(s) last.
You, Chris, Pat and we will ride in one car.
You and Fran make a lovely couple.
Kelly and I may decide to attend.
You three and I can make the finsl foursome.
This is merely the custom I was taught, and has nothing to do with grammar.
Sometimes by practicing good manners or good grammar, you risk sounding rigid or snobbish or nerdy, any kinds of points-off.
Not in this case though- I believe putting 1st person last, in language and otherwise, is still widely a socially observed rule; any points-off is when you don't do it.
It could suggest office command chain though, which depends on the context. Better watch if it might sound wrong.
RobertB said
Sometimes by practicing good manners or good grammar, you risk sounding rigid or snobbish or nerdy, any kinds of points-off.
I have to disagree. There should never be a time when one is embarrassed to have good manners or speak correctly. This is a problem we have passed on to our children and it surfaces in the form of laziness.