Gay and Retard: A Linguistic Discussion. "I recalled the discussion I had last week with other Perpetual Posters regarding the slang use of words like ‘gay' and ‘retarded'. I began to unpack what I really meant to say about Brian's sparkly blue bowling ball, and what I meant to imply by referring to it as ‘gay'."
See the related post about ending the word "retard".
For some reason this discussion of the words gay and retard reminds me of President Obama's Special Olympics gaffe. Often enough there is some cruelty under the surface of humor, even if not intended. Should the kinder folks among us reconsider how we use humor? (Taking some of the “fun†out of it, so to speak?)
Update on the Obama gaffe: Official apologies have been issued for the "thoughtless remark." As politics go, those who like Obama are saying that it was just one of those minor slips that everyone makes from time to time. Those who don't like Obama, such as Sarah Palin, say they were "shocked by the degrading remark." During the election campaign Palin would complain about "gotcha politics" and "gotcha journalism."
Another interesting twist to this story is discussion about why the Tonight Show audience laughed at the remark. In other words, the audience shouldn't have laughed at all, and instead should have been shocked into silence or perhaps even booed the president.
The point of this is not to invite a discussion of politics. But this adds another dimension to a linguistic discussion of controversial words and expressions.
Neither "retard" nor "gay" can be banned. I'm not saying they shouldn't -- just that they can't.
I have an 8th grade son, and both of these words are solidly middle school in both popularity and also in maturity. (Both of them are on my own prohibited word list in my house.)
(And I mean "retard (stupid)" and "gay (weak, unsuccessful, non-mainstream)".)
To borrow an idea from Martha's mini-cast ("What the Cluck?"), both of these are pecking order words -- confrontational or put-down words intended to establish superiority. As such, they fill a critical role in junior high. If they were actually banished, something else would have to be used, or else they would just start beating each other.
(When I gently broached the common meaning of "gay" to my 8th grader last week, he blanched, and stammered, astonished, that "they" had no idea of what they were talking about in using the term. I'm sure that he hadn't, either. And in my school district, which only recognizes the sexual orientation meaning of the term, its hostile use is considered "hate speech", and is an EXPELLABLE offense. :eek:)
Anyway, "gay" doesn't have anything to do with festiveness or with sexuality, and both words fill a CRITICAL language role in the social world of junior high.
And, actually, with this third meaning of the word gay (1 festive/happy 2 homosexual 3 weak/non-mainstream/undesireable), I am looking forward to the next change in what to call amorous male couples, for I think that "That's so gay!" will cause a linguistic evolution here, again, as gays seek a word that is still kind.
(Then, maybe, after the trend of gay-3 wears off, we can have gay-1 back. I really miss it.)
"Festive" has had to work overtime in my vocabulary. My sister has not yet changed her middle name to "festive:" the middle initial G has had to stand alone for decades.