My favorite euphemism for diarrhea is "fast track sallies," as in; "I can't have caffeine because it gives me the fast track sallies." I have no idea where the saying comes from. It's not something that was used in my family when I was growing up - I've read it somewhere and decided I liked it, so now I use it. If anyone has any info on the origins of this saying, I'd love to find out about it. I did an internet search, but didn't come up with anything. Thanks, Katherine
You might have the Willies before that, no?  But don't be no Debbie downer.  All you do, speedy Gonzales to the nearest John. You're done before you can say Jack Robinson.  Fanny's your aunt !