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<rant>One of my favorite red-flag issues in the few years has been the near-disappearance of "must not". In its place, I almost always hear "cannot".
"Be careful; you can't drop that!" Well, if I'm unable to drop it then why is he warning me? Seems to me he means I can drop it—he's afraid I'll drop it—and is asking me to be careful not to.
What worries me is that many people don't understand this even when it's pointed out. If I say, in my patented smart-alecky way, "Yes, I believe I can drop it", I'm very likely to hear "Well, but I mean you can't drop it" (as though the additional emphasis changes the meaning of the word). I'm reduced to saying "you mean that I mustn't drop it".
This is merely annoying. But it has more confusing consequences when the intent of the speaker isn't already clear:
"The influence of alcohol on driving habits cannot be over-estimated." The literal meaning is that it is impossible to overestimate the influence alcohol on driving habits (I suppose because that influence is infinitely great). But if the author really meant "One mustn't overestimate the influence...", then he means that even though its influence may be important, it is not ALL-important. Which did he mean? The degradation of "cannot" makes it hard to be sure, even if he was writing carefully.</rant>
I hear you Bob. It's the same thing with can and may these days. The difference in meaning seems to be lost in general usage. In formal writing, I make that distinction. In casual writing, I try not to buck the trend.
Edit: Recalled how, in grade school, when you'd ask the nuns "Can I go to the restroom?" they'd say something like "Well, I'm sure you can." They probably thought that correction was hilarious at some level. Always annoyed me, but taught me the difference.
asusena Yerevan, Armenia said
The study of the data reveals that can was formal , and may informal long ago. Now, it's just the opposite.
What study of data are you referring to here? Had to check to online dictionary after reading your comment, and found an interesting Usage Note on this page: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/can
Apparently there's some disagreement even among the "experts" regarding can vs. may. But it seems they do agree with you that may is more formal.
Growing up as a child, I always heard that "can I?" means "am I able?", while "may I?" means "am I permitted?", and I still understand it that way. No one told me (and therefore I never learned) that "may" is formal, per se, except in the sense that it might be considered "formal" to say it the way our parents taught us rather than as our playmates said it.
Martha Barnette
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